“Life is unfair.” I’ve yet to find a single person who will debate this. We struggle all our lives to be happy and in the end we die. It’s supremely unfair! The person who said “Life’s a bitch and then you die!” sure hit that particular nail square on the head. Most people seem to follow the same haphazard path of unhappiness in life.

For almost everyone, life is just one endless series of grim problems. You work hard to achieve something, and the world conspires against you, casting your plans and dreams and hard work into a violent of despair and doubt. When that crisis gets resolved, another more serious one arises that makes all the rest look trifling in comparison! It’s just one thing after another.

Are you nodding your head?

You aren’t the only one. We live in the present but we worry about the future. All through our lives, we worry about financial security for our retirement, a permanent home over our heads, food for the future and money to support our children. It’s an endless race to reach something that may or may not even be there for us! Think about it. Is there any guarantee that you will live to retirement? We take it for granted that slaving right now will allow us to enjoy our money in the future. But what is the guarantee that you will live to enjoy it? We just don’t have any other way to live our lives. Right?

Stop nodding your head now.

I once met a person who was really happy all the time. She wasn’t rich… quite the opposite in fact. She lived in a rented house and her family of five scraped by on her husband’s income which was paltry. But SHE WAS HAPPY! How could this be possible? I spent an entire week wondering about this before I could gather up enough courage to ask her about it. And the answer stupefied me!

She said, “I have a husband who loves me, children who are really great and help out in any way possible, a home and a happy family! What more could I want?”

What more could she want??!?!

Was she blind? Did she not have eyes? Just look around you and you will see no shortage of what more can you want. How could she not want what everyone could plainly see that she didn’t have? What was the difference between her and me? The answer, when it finally arrived, was jarring to my senses and to my sensibilities… What she had was a simple joy in the present and what she had right then.

I realized that this is what we all want and strive for. Happiness and joy. But in our stressed out lifestyle, we think we are working for happiness and joy in the hypothetical future we are creating. We want to be happy but we assume that slaving miserably today for financial security, educationally and emotionally secure children and a permanent home will create happiness for us in the future. But that is not true and deep down you and I already know it. If you can’t find that joy and happiness today then you won’t find it tomorrow either.

It’s not easy to aim for the present and to enjoy it completely… I know that… I find it difficult too. Find joy in your spouse, your children and what you have at present. Take the time to slow down, and care for yourself. Take a day off from work; the world will not fall apart if you don’t go to the office for a day. Walk in the world and observe and enjoy. You already have what you need to make you happy. You just haven’t noticed it yet.

PS. If you have trouble finding the joy that she has, the joy that is your birthright to have every single day of your life, you should consider trying a life enrichment program.

Don't get mad!

Are there times when you have actually felt like ripping a person’s throat out?

You can almost feel the blood leaking out her throat and that contemplation itself can be infinitely calming to you and your indignant psyche!

Forget the thought that it’s a crime, and you could be arrested and you could lose everything that you have ever worked for…but the sheer visualization of that vengeance on that particularly infuriating person can be infinitely soothing to the mind!

Did you notice something here?

We all get angry and we all think about getting revenge on that bleepity bleeping bleep… but very few of us actually act on the impulses that arise from anger. Of course, you might go home and bang around a few doors and attack a few pots, and shout at the family but rest assured that most of us do not spend our days actively planning revenge and vengeance on those people who annoy us on a daily basis! So what makes you and me different from the average psychopath and what holds us back?

Let’s find out why you get angry-

It’s easy to see that you will bump against a lot of people who will aggravate you day in and day out. And when you cannot deal with the frustrations and irritations of day to day life, you resort to anger which is nothing but your body’s defense reaction causing it to push away that irritating person or situation. You tend to lash out against anyone and everyone who will aggravate you. But this is not the only reaction that you will notice. For some reason, angry people tend to get in to fights more commonly. You would think that people would realize that you are upset and leave you alone but the exact opposite happens with you getting into more fights and verbal or even physical arguments with spouses and strangers alike.

Can you control it?

Yes you can and you should. Anger can be destructive and it can be wonderfully cleansing at the same time. Accept the fact that you can control neither the person in front driving you insane, nor can you change the situation that you are in at present. But you can step aside and let your mind take a closer look at what is causing you so much pain. Try to separate out the physical reactions of soaring blood pressure, and flushed skin and a roaring heart beat from emotional feelings of powerful guilt, feelings of failure and disappointment, rage, murder and suicide. It’s not easy, we know that but what you will eventually notice is that anger is not wrong; and neither is an angry person bad at heart. It’s just that most people let their emotions overwhelm their thoughts to a degree that you cannot differentiate thought from emotion. Judgment gets impaired and you spend the rest of your life inconsolable and vowing revenge for something that you do not even remember.

Is this situation worth wasting so much of your precious life for? Think about it and just let it go. You will get multiples joys along your life; this angry situation is just not worth it!